20 Rules in any Office


20 Rules In Any Office:

office rules

  1. The Boss is always right.
  2. If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.
  3. Those who work get more work. Others get pay, perks, and promotions.
  4. Ph.D. stands for “Pull Him Down”. The more intelligent, hardworking and committed a person is,  the bigger the number of people willing to pull him down.
  5. If you are good, you will get all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.
  6. When the Bosses are talking about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.
  7. It doesn’t matter what you do. What matters is what you say you’ve done and what you are going to do.
  8. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters away from a kick in the butt.
  9. Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
  10. The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.
  11. If at first you don’t succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it…
  12. When you don’t know what to do, walk fast and look worried.
  13. Following the rules will not get the job done.
  14. If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.
  15. Everything can be filed under “Miscellaneous” .
  16. No matter how much you do, you can never do enough.
  17. You can do any amount of work provided it isn’t the work you are supposed to be doing.
  18. In order to get a promotion, you need not necessarily know your job.
  19. In order to get a promotion, you only need to pretend that you know your job.
  20. The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.


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6 Responses to “20 Rules in any Office”

  1. Randy Pena says:

    February 19th, 2010 at 4:01 am

    Hello. I was reading someone elses blog and saw you on their blogroll. Would you be interested in exchanging blog roll links? If so, feel free to email me.

    Thanks.

  2. StarMars says:

    February 20th, 2010 at 12:46 pm

    I’m not interested in link exchanges now. Maybe in the future…

  3. JuneZach says:

    February 23rd, 2010 at 1:31 am

    Some points are somewhat funny but practical. :)

  4. bingkee says:

    February 25th, 2010 at 2:33 pm

    This is hilarious….did you make this up?

  5. StarMars says:

    February 26th, 2010 at 6:29 am

    Nope. It is one of the many random emails that I saved on my hard drive.

  6. meretrisha says:

    March 6th, 2010 at 3:27 am

    hahaha.. this one's funny.. i knew rule #1 and #2 but i didn't know there are actually 20 rules in the office to live by! LOL

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